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W.C. Fields
(29 Jan 1880 - 25 Dec 1946)
American comedian.
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Science Quotes by W.C. Fields (3 quotes)
[Introducing two perfectly ordinary performers of average stature to a circus audience.]
The Punkwat twins! Brentwood is the world's smallest giant, whilst his brother, Elwood, is the largest midget in the world. They baffle science!
The Punkwat twins! Brentwood is the world's smallest giant, whilst his brother, Elwood, is the largest midget in the world. They baffle science!
— W.C. Fields
As character Larson E. Whipsnade, circus ring-master, in movie, You Can't Cheat an Honest Man (1939). As transcribed in Simon Louvish, Man on the Flying Trapeze: The Life and Times of W. C. Fields (1999), 4.
After two days in the hospital, I took a turn for the nurse.
— W.C. Fields
Attributed.
I am an expert of electricity. My father occupied the chair of applied electricity at the state prison.
— W.C. Fields
Movie, The Big Broadcast of 1938 (1938). In Larry Langman and Paul Gold, Comedy Quotes from the Movies (2001), 248. Note that this is a variation of a similar joke published nearly two decades earlier. For example, ‘My father occupied the chair of applied physics at Cambridge.’ ‘Dat’s nuttin’; mine occupied the seat of applied electricity at Sing Sing. —Voo Doo.” included in University of Virginia, Virginia Reel (May 1920), Vol. 1, 68.
In science it often happens that scientists say, 'You know that's a really good argument; my position is mistaken,' and then they would actually change their minds and you never hear that old view from them again. They really do it. It doesn't happen as often as it should, because scientists are human and change is sometimes painful. But it happens every day. I cannot recall the last time something like that happened in politics or religion.
(1987) -- 
