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Tom Lehrer
(9 Apr 1928 - )
American mathematician and satirist who remains well-known for his witty, satirical songs that he performed and recorded in the 1950s-60s singing and accompanying himself on the piano.
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Science Quotes by Tom Lehrer (5 quotes)
“Once the rockets are up
Who cares where they come down
That's not my department,”
Says Wernher von Braun.
Who cares where they come down
That's not my department,”
Says Wernher von Braun.
— Tom Lehrer
Stanza from song, 'Wernher von Braun' on record That Was the Year That Was (Jul 1965). As cited in Michael J. Hogan and Thomas G. Paterson, Explaining the History of American Foreign Relations (2004), 91.
~~[Attributed]~~ Some of you may have met mathematicians and wondered how they got that way.
— Tom Lehrer
Webmaster has not yet been able to find verification in a primary print source. (Can you help?)
Gather round while I sing you of Wernher von Braun,
A man whose allegiance
Is ruled by expedience.
Call him a Nazi, he won't even frown.
“ha, Nazi sch-mazi,” says Wernher von Braun.
A man whose allegiance
Is ruled by expedience.
Call him a Nazi, he won't even frown.
“ha, Nazi sch-mazi,” says Wernher von Braun.
— Tom Lehrer
Stanza from song, 'Wernher von Braun' on record That Was the Year That Was (Jul 1965). Collected in script to musical, Tom Foolery: The Words and Music of Tom Lehrer (1986), 35.
There's antimony, arsenic, aluminium, selenium,
And hydrogen and oxygen and nitrogen and rhenium,
And nickel, neodymium, neptunium, germanium,
And iron, americium, ruthenium, uranium,
Europium, zirconium, lutetium, vanadium,
And lanthanum and osmium and astatine and radium,
And gold and protactinium and indium and gallium,
And iodine and thorium and thulium and thallium.
There's yttrium, ytterbium, actinium, rubidium,
And boron, gadolinium, niobium, iridium,
And strontium and silicon and silver and samarium,
And bismuth, bromine, lithium, beryllium and barium.
There's holmium and helium and hafnium and erbium,
And phosphorus and francium and fluorine and terbium,
And manganese and mercury, molybdenum, magnesium,
Dysprosium and scandium and cerium and cesium,
And lead, praseodymium and platinum, plutonium,
Palladium, promethium, potassium, polonium,
And tantalum, technetium, titanium, tellurium,
And cadmium and calcium and chromium and curium.
There's sulfur, californium and fermium, berkelium,
And also mendelevium, einsteinium, nobelium,
And argon, krypton, neon, radon, xenon, zinc and rhodium,
And chlorine, cobalt, carbon, copper, tungsten, tin and sodium.
These are the only ones of which the news has come to Harvard,
And there may be many others, but they haven't been discarvard.
[To the tune of I am the Very Model of a Modern Major General.]
And hydrogen and oxygen and nitrogen and rhenium,
And nickel, neodymium, neptunium, germanium,
And iron, americium, ruthenium, uranium,
Europium, zirconium, lutetium, vanadium,
And lanthanum and osmium and astatine and radium,
And gold and protactinium and indium and gallium,
And iodine and thorium and thulium and thallium.
There's yttrium, ytterbium, actinium, rubidium,
And boron, gadolinium, niobium, iridium,
And strontium and silicon and silver and samarium,
And bismuth, bromine, lithium, beryllium and barium.
There's holmium and helium and hafnium and erbium,
And phosphorus and francium and fluorine and terbium,
And manganese and mercury, molybdenum, magnesium,
Dysprosium and scandium and cerium and cesium,
And lead, praseodymium and platinum, plutonium,
Palladium, promethium, potassium, polonium,
And tantalum, technetium, titanium, tellurium,
And cadmium and calcium and chromium and curium.
There's sulfur, californium and fermium, berkelium,
And also mendelevium, einsteinium, nobelium,
And argon, krypton, neon, radon, xenon, zinc and rhodium,
And chlorine, cobalt, carbon, copper, tungsten, tin and sodium.
These are the only ones of which the news has come to Harvard,
And there may be many others, but they haven't been discarvard.
[To the tune of I am the Very Model of a Modern Major General.]
— Tom Lehrer
Song, 'The Elements' (1959). In Tom Lehrer,Too Many Songs by Tom Lehrer: With Not Enough Drawings by Ronald Searle (1981), 151.
Who made me the genius I am today,
The mathematician that others all quote?
Who’s the professor that made me that way,
The greatest that ever got chalk on his coat?
One man deserves the credit;
One man deserves the blame,
And Nicolai Ivanovich Lobachevsky is his name. Oy!
Nicolai Ivanovich Lobach…
I am never forget the day I first meet the great Lobachevsky.
In one word he told me the secret of success in mathematics:
Plagiarize!
Plagiarize,
Let no one else’s work evade your eyes.
Remember why the good Lord made your eyes,
So don’t shade your eyes.
But plagiarize, plagiarize, plagiarize —
Only be sure always to call it please “research”.
And ever since I meet this man, my life is not the same.
And Nicolai Ivanovich Lobachevsky is his name. Oy!
Nicolai Ivanovich Lobach…
The mathematician that others all quote?
Who’s the professor that made me that way,
The greatest that ever got chalk on his coat?
One man deserves the credit;
One man deserves the blame,
And Nicolai Ivanovich Lobachevsky is his name. Oy!
Nicolai Ivanovich Lobach…
I am never forget the day I first meet the great Lobachevsky.
In one word he told me the secret of success in mathematics:
Plagiarize!
Plagiarize,
Let no one else’s work evade your eyes.
Remember why the good Lord made your eyes,
So don’t shade your eyes.
But plagiarize, plagiarize, plagiarize —
Only be sure always to call it please “research”.
And ever since I meet this man, my life is not the same.
And Nicolai Ivanovich Lobachevsky is his name. Oy!
Nicolai Ivanovich Lobach…
— Tom Lehrer
In lyrics of his song 'Lobachevski' recorded on his first album Songs by Tom Lehrer (1953). First performed as part a musical revue, The Physical Revue (1951–1952).